Shrek Amp 2001 Amp Far Out Films-Books Pdf

SHREK amp 2001 amp Far Out Films
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Whoa Hold on Do you know what that thing can do to you. Yeah it ll grind your bones for it s bread,Shrek sneaks up behind them and laughs. Yes well actually that would be a giant Now ogres oh they re much worse They ll. make a suit from your freshly peeled skin, They ll shave your liver Squeeze the jelly from your eyes. Actually it s quite good on toast, Back Back beast Back I warn ya He waves the torch at Shrek. Shrek calmly licks his fingers and extinguishes the torch. The men shrink back away from him Shrek roars very loudly the men roar loudly back. His long and his breath extinguishes all the remaining torches until the men are in the. Whispers to Man 1 This is the part where you run away. The men scramble to run away He laughs And stay out. He looks down and picks up a piece of paper Reads Wanted Fairy tale. creatures He sighs and throws the paper over his shoulder. CUT TO DAYTIME THE FOREST, There is a line of fairy tale creatures The head of the guard sits at a table paying people. for bringing the fairy tale creatures to him There are cages all around We see Peter Pan. Tinkerbell the seven dwarves Gipetto and Pinocchio and the three little pigs. SHREK 1 SCRIPT, All right This one s full Take it away Move it along Come on Get up.
HEAD GUARD,GUARD taking the witch s broom, Give me that Your flying days are over Breaks the broom in half. HEAD GUARD,That s 20 pieces of silver for the witch Next. Get up Come on Sit down there Be quiet,LITTLE BEAR. Crying This cage is too small, Please don t turn me in I ll never be stubborn again I can change. Please Give me another chance,Oh shut up jerks his rope.
HEAD GUARD,Next What have you got,This little wooden puppet. I m not a puppet I m a real boy His nose grows,HEAD GUARD. Five shillings for the possessed toy Take it away,Father please Don t let them do this Help me. Gipetto takes the money and walks off The old woman steps up to the table. HEAD GUARD,Next What have you got,SHREK 1 SCRIPT,Well I ve got a talking donkey. HEAD GUARD, Right Well that s good for ten shillings if you can prove it.
Oh go ahead little fella Donkey just looks up at her. HEAD GUARD, Oh oh he s just he s just a little nervous He s really quite a chatterbox Talk you. boneheaded dolt,HEAD GUARD,That s it I ve heard enough Guards. No no he talks He does Pretends to be Donkey I can talk I love to talk. I m the talkingest damn thing you ever saw,HEAD GUARD. Get her out of my sight,No no I swear Oh He can talk. The guards grab the old woman and she struggles with them One of her legs flies out. and kicks Tinkerbell out of Peter Pan s hands and her cage drops on Donkey s head He. gets sprinkled with fairy dust and he s able to fly. Hey I can fly,He can fly,3 LITTLE PIGS,He can fly,HEAD GUARD.
He can talk,SHREK 1 SCRIPT, Ha ha That s right fool Now I m a flying talking donkey. You might have seen a housefly maybe even a superfly. but I bet you ain t never seen a donkey fly Ha ha,The pixie dust begins to wear off. He begins to sink to the ground He hits the ground with a thud. HEAD GUARD,Donkey takes of running,HEAD GUARD,He s getting away Get him This way Turn. Donkey keeps running and he eventually runs into Shrek Donkey looks scared when he. spots the guards coming up the path He quickly hides behind Shrek. HEAD GUARD,You there Ogre,HEAD GUARD, By the order of Lord Farquaad I am authorized to place you both under arrest and. transport you to a designated resettlement facility. Oh really You and what army, Shrek looks behind the guard and the guard turns to see that all other men have.
SHREK 1 SCRIPT, deserted him The guard runs off too Shrek laughs and begins walking back to his. cottage Donkey follows,Can I say something to you,Listen you was really really somethin back here. Incredible,Are you talkin to,Shrek turns around and Donkey is gone. Shrek turns back around and Donkey is right in front of him. Yes I was talkin to you, Can I tell you that you that you was great back there. Those guards They thought they was all of that,Then you showed up and bam.
They was trippin over themselves like babes in the woods. That really made me feel good to see that,Oh that s great Really. Man it s good to be free,SHREK 1 SCRIPT,Now why don t you go celebrate your freedom. with your own friends Hmm,But uh I don t have any friends. And I m not goin out there by myself,Hey wait a minute I got a great idea. I ll stick with you You re mean green fightin machine. Together we ll scare the spit out of anybody that crosses us. Shrek turns and regards Donkey for a moment before roaring very loudly. Oh wow That was really scary,If you don t mind me sayin if that don t work.
your breath certainly will get the job done, cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs or something. cause you breath stinks Man, You almost burned the hair outta my nose just like the time. Shrek covers his mouth but Donkey continues to talk so Shrek removes his hand. then I ate some rotten berries, Man I had strong gases leaking out of my butt that day. Why are you following me,I ll tell you why, Singing Cause I m all alone There s no one here beside me. My problems have all gone There s no one to deride me. But you gotta have faith,SHREK 1 SCRIPT,Stop singing.
Well it s no wonder you don t have any friends, Wow Only a true friend would be that cruelly honest. Listen little donkey Take a look at me What am I,Looks all the way up at Shrek. Uh really tall,No I m an ogre You know,Grab your torch and pitchforks. Doesn t that bother you,Really really,Man I like you What s you name. Shrek Well you know what I like about you Shrek, You got that kind of I don t care what nobody thinks of me thing.
I like that I respect that Shrek You all right, Shrek and Donkey come over a hill and you can see Shrek s cottage. SHREK 1 SCRIPT, Whoa Look at that Who d want to live in place like that. That would be my home,Oh And it is lovely Just beautiful. You know you are quite a decorator, It s amazing what you ve done with such a modest budget. I like that boulder That is a nice boulder, Shrek walks past all the keep out beware signs he has erected.
I guess you don t entertain much do you,I like my privacy. You know I do too That s another thing we have in common. Like I hate it when you got somebody in your face, You ve trying to give them a hint and they won t leave. There s that big awkward silence you know,Big awkward silence. Can I stay with you,Can I stay with you please,Sarcastically Of course. SHREK 1 SCRIPT,Please I don t wanna go back there, You don t know what it s like to be considered a freak.
Pause while he looks at Shrek,Well maybe you do,But that s why we gotta stick together. You gotta let me stay Please Please,Okay Okay But one night only. Ah Thank you,Donkey runs inside Shrek s cottage,CUT TO INT DAYTIME SHREK S COTTAGE. What are you,Donkey hops up onto a confortable armchair. This is gonna be fun,We can stay up late swappin manly stories.
and in the mornin I m makin waffles,Where do uh I sleep. SHREK 1 SCRIPT,Irritated Outside,Oh well I guess that s cool. I mean I don t know you and you don t know me,so I guess outside is best you know. Sniffs Here I go Good night,CUT TO EXT DAYTIME SHREKS COTTAGE. Donkey has his head down walking out of Shrek s cottage He looks sad Behind him. Shrek slams the door Donkey sighs,CUT TO INT DAYTIME SHREK S COTTAGE.
Shrek can hear Donkey outside,I mean I do like the outdoors I m a donkey. I was born outside I ll just be sitting by myself outside. I guess you know By myself outside,Sings I m all alone there s no one here beside me. CUT TO INT NIGHT SHREK S COTTAGE, It s dinnertime Shrek places an eyeball in a martini and takes a drink He sits himself. down and pulls from his ear a candle made out of earwax which he lights Donkey looks. in through a window He is eating when he hears a noise He stands up with a huff. To Donkey I thought I told you to stay outside,From the window I am outside. There is another noise and Shrek turns He sees several shadows moving He finally sees. the 3 blind mice on his table,SHREK 1 SCRIPT,BLIND MOUSE 1.
Well gents it s a far cry from the farm,but what choice do we have. BLIND MOUSE 2,It s not home but it ll do just fine. Bouncing on a slug What a lovely bed, Shrek grabs Gordo the mouse but it escapes and lands on his shoulder. I found some cheese,Gordo the mouse bites Shrek s ear. Blah Awful stuff,BLIND MOUSE 1,Is that you Gordo,How did you know.
Shrek grabs the 3 mice,What are you doing in my house. He gets bumped from behind so he drops the mice,SHREK 1 SCRIPT. Shrek turns and sees the Seven Dwarves with Snow White on the table. Oh no no no Dead broad off the table,Where are we supposed to put her The bed s taken. Shrek marches into the bedroom He throws back the curtain The Big Bad Wolf is lying. BIG BAD WOLF, Shrek drags the wolf to his front door by his collar. CUT TO EXT NIGHT SHREK S COTTAGE, Shrek opens the door and is stunned to see all the fairy tale creatures in his swamp.
I live in a swamp I put up signs I m a terrifying ogre. What do I have to do to get a little privacy, He opens the front door to throw the Wolf out and he sees that all the collected Fairy. Tale Creatures are on his land,Oh no No No, Montage of various fairy tale creatures 3 Bears Pied Piper with rats elves fairies and. SHREK 1 SCRIPT,What are you doing in my swamp, Everyone falls silent Gasps Three good fairies hide inside a tent. All right get out of here All of you move it,Come on Let s go Hurry up Hurry up. THE DWARVES,Hey Quickly Come on,Dwarves run inside the house.
No no No no Not there Not there, Shrek gives chase but they shut the door on him He can t get in. Turns to look at Donkey,Hey don t look at me I didn t invite them. Oh gosh no one invited us,We were forced to come here. Flabbergasted By who,LITTLE PIG, Lord Farquaad He huffed and he puffed and he signed an eviction notice. SHREK 1 SCRIPT,Heavy sigh All right,Who knows where this Farquaad guy is.
Everyone looks around at each other but no one answers. Oh I do I know where he is,Does anyone else know where to find him. Anyone at all,Oh Oh pick me Oh I know I know Me me. Donkey is bouncing high into the air Shrek is deliberately ignoring him. Sigh Okay fine Attention all fairy tale things, Do not get comfortable Your welcome is officially worn out. In fact I m gonna see this guy Farquaad right now, and get you all off my land and back where you came from. Pause Then the crowd goes wild clapping and cheering. To Donkey You You re comin with me,SHREK 1 SCRIPT,.

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